February 19, 2007

Visiting Prabhu at the Hospital

After his operation, I finally got to visit Prabhu at the hospital this evening. The hospital staff would let in only two people in the morning and two in the evening during the half hour 'visitor hours' time. I had to wait my turn after all the relatives are done.



When I went in, Prabhu was awake and in good conscious state. Usually, he would be in a drowsy state because of all the medications.

I was not sure whether photography within the critical care unit was allowed and so checked with the 'sister'. I told her that there are many people who have helped financially and there are many more who are interested in seeing Prabhu. She immediately gave permission. That's her checking Prabhu when he complained that he has chest pain while talking.



Prabhu's left cheek had been scraped from the fall but is healing fast. He is still not able to freely turn around because of injury to his neck and the spinal cord. During operation, the doctors have strengthened the spinal cord with a steel rod to give it support.

I leaned toward Prabhu's ears and told him of all the financial support that we were able to collect to meet his hospital expenses. He wanted to convey his thanks to all (and as he spoke these words, his eyes began to well up). The 'sister', seeing his tears immediately asked me to step aside and told me that if be begins to cry or weep, he might develop cold and cough. And if he coughs, it would be terribly hurting for him. I didn't bring up the topic again.



Prabhu's legs have heavy bandage around his knees. He still has no sensation below his hips. After about four to five days, he may be shifted to CMC Vellore for further treatment on doctor's recommendation. I'm told that the physiotherapy dept is one of the best around.

Prabhu's room has been changed to Room# 23 in the critical care unit of Apollo Hospital.

I will continue the update on Prabhu's health at the wiki.

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The Amazing Act of Kindness of SRM College Students

The students of SRM Engineering college have helped collect over one lakh rupees towards Prabhu's hospital expenses. Towards the end of this post, I'll tell you why this act of kindness is so special.



In this picture, Shailendra, a student representative from SRM Engg college hands over the contributions cheque to Prabhu's parents. Let me hasten to add that it was very awkward for me to ask request them for a photograph. I had to do it. It was important to let others know of the tremendous help that students are doing.



And here's why this help is so very special. None of the students from SRM know about Prabhu. They have never seem him much like most of you. Prabhu is a student of Mohd.Sadak Engineering college. The SRM guys will only know how Prabhu looks like when I mail them the photographs.

A couple of student voluneteers from Mohd.Sadak had gone to SRM and requested their friends out there to help. A few compassionate students from SRM took up this task and spread the word around the campus and helped collect Rs.1.03 lakhs. Notice carefully that the cheque has been drawn in the name of Apollo Hospitals to make sure that the money goes only for the hospital expenses. They also gave Rs.5000 in cash knowing that the parents might need cash for other expenses.

I had goosebumps. I was amazed at the maturity of the students.

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February 18, 2007

Turning Adversity into an Advantage

We all have a lot to learn from Alexis Leon. He's the guy who has grabbed life from the jaws of death.

In 1993, Alexis, who was then working as systems analyst at TCS, met with a road accident that left him crippled for life. Doctors told him that he can't walk in his life. This accident happened three weeks before his marriage and a month before he was to fly to Switzerland.

Today, he is a popular author of 41 technical books and runs his own successful consulting firm. He turned a life crippling disaster into an advantage.

Alexis explains his whole story in his own words. A moving and an inspiring story. I strongly recommend you go read it.

Eight years ago, I met him in person at his home to seek his help in authoring a book. I picked up his phone number from one of his books I was browing at Higginbothams, called him up and fixed an appointment to meet him. When I went to his home, I was shocked to see a wheel chair bound person in front of me. We spent a long time discussing about a book that I never got to publish.

Time passed by and I completely forgot about him until a person left a comment pointing to his website. I got to read his life story and was really moved.

I'm going to read out Alexis' story to Prabhu, the boy who met with a near similar life crippling fate. Alexis has shown that when adversity stares at you, the best way to do is show your middle finger and live life to the fullest.

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February 16, 2007

We Have Made a Difference

Together, we have helped collect Rs.1.9 lakhs for a boy who really needed help. That's 839% more than what we originally planned to collect. Its a major help for the boy's parents who faced a financial black hole. We have helped cover one fifth of the estimated hospital expenses. A true help in need.

The fund raiser has ended and the money has already helped meet some of the hospital expenses. Updates on Prabhu's health will continue at the wiki.

On behalf of Prabhu's family, a heartfelt thanks to each one of you who have stepped forward to help. Thank you for offering hope.

Thank you to those who helped spread the word by posting on your blogs, sending out emails and telling your friends.

Thank you to those who left initial comments and emails to help. You made this simple blog post change into a powerful fundraiser.

Thank you for bestowing trust in humanity. You didn't know Prabhu. You didn't know his parents. And most of you didn't know me. That's why this help is so special.

Thank you. From our hearts.

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Prabhu's Operation a Failure

(If you are new here, please click here and scroll down to read about Prabhu and how we are trying to help him)

Prabhu's operation got over at 2:30 pm this afternoon. After a three and half hour operation, the doctors have given up. They were unable to repair the nerves that were severely squashed by the compression of the spinal chord bones. The doctors didn't mince any words. Prabhu will be wheel chair bound for the rest of his life.

On the brighter side, he won't be a living vegetable. His brain is active. The internal bleeding will soon subside. As part of post-operative procedure, the hospital will provide him physiotherapy and psychotherapy. For a 18 year old boy to know that he can't walk for the rest of his life can be difficult to swallow. Thankfully, there are professionals to help.

I was meaning to visit the hospital today evening but the hospital staff won't allow any visitors for today. Tomorrow will be doubtful too. Many of you have mailed in to see photos of Prabhu. That's very understandable. I will try my best to get one. At the Critical Care Unit, there are restrictions but will try to get one when I get there.

I have been updating the HelpPrabhu Wiki on the progress of Prabhu's health. I will continue to update the wiki as I slowly move away to other topics on this blog. There are many who have graciously offered support and its my duty to keep all informed about the person they helped.




The fund raising will close tomorrow morning. That'll help in withdrawing the money and handing it over to the person who has helped loan the money to the parents. The parents still stare at a hefty hospital bill which is beyond their means. Prabhu's collegemates have helped collect Rs. 1.46 lakhs. We have helped raise Rs. 1.13 lakhs. Prabhu's relatives have helped collect around Rs.2 lakhs. In total, that's a collection of Rs.4.6 lakhs. That's still around another Rs.4 lakhs needed to meet the hospital expenditure of Rs.8.5 lakhs. We may never fill in the gap but atleast we can try reducing it a little. Any small help will be appreciated.

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February 15, 2007

'Thank You' Just Doesn't Do

To everyone who had helped with money and sent in words of support, thank you very much. It's a help in need.

You also put me to shame. The day after the accident happened, I consciously told myself that I will not post on my blog asking for donations. Why? Because I did not want to sound like a deposed Nigerian Army General or the Ugandan millionaire. Those scam mails have taken the trust out of Internet.

To me, helping with donating blood, making the customary visits to hospital and offering moral support sounded good enough. Until the comments and email came in with offers to help that truly made me put my face down in shame. And I admit that in front of you. I could have done much more than I did. Thank you for correcting my narrow mindedness.

When this fund raising initiative was started, I told the boy's sister not to mention about this to the parents. Why? Because, I wasn't sure we will collect enough. I didn't want them to have an expectation and then let them down.

When I woke up this morning and opened up this page, I was astonished to see the generosity of people. Thank you for lending your support to a boy you don't even know. To see more than Rs.1 lakh collected in less than a day is a humbling gesture of kindness.

The money lies in Prema's (the boy's cousin sister) PayPal account. Since it takes about 20 days for the money to be withdrawn in India, one of the person known to Prema has offered to loan out the money until the paypal money reaches India.

The money couldn't have come in at a better time. Prabhu's operation has been fixed for today afternoon. The doctors have said the operation might take upto four hours. I will update the progress of his health and all fund raising initiatives at the wiki ( http://HelpPrabhu.pbwiki.com )



People have sent in requests to keep the ChipIn account open. They have taken the effort to mail their office colleagues, friends in their clubs and alumni network. Amazing.

The total hospital expenditure will run to Rs.8.5 lakhs ($19,000). We have collected over Rs.1 lakh ($2120). If you can, please chipin a little. Evey small amount we collect will help the boy and his parents.

Thanks once again to everyone who generously helped with money, sent in words of support, offered prayers and helped spread the word around. You proved that there is hope in times of darkness.

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February 14, 2007

The Kindness Towards an Absolute Stranger

I'm amazed and I'm touched by the compassion and kindness that people show towards someone who they have never seen, never met and never spoken to.

When I wrote about my neighbour's tragic accident, many nice people left words of comfort and offers to help.

I'll say it again. I'm amazed and I'm touched.

Thank you guys. You have no idea what difference you made to the morale of the boy's parents, friends and relatives . You think you just left a comment or sent an email, but it truly made a differenece to folks here. At a time when the parents and friends were so down psychologically, this act of kindness from people whom they don't even know, offered them solace.

And, you didn't even know the boy's name. Yet, you offered to help.

The boy's name is Prabhu. Prabhakaran is his full name. I went to Apollo Hospital to take a look at him. He has been shifted from Intensive Care Unit (ICU) to Critical Care Unit (CCU), the highest care unit. While walking in, I met a familiar person... a distant relative of mine is in charge of CCU as anaesthetist. She told me about the Prabhu's condition. The fall from the 3rd floor building has crushed his spinal cord. This has squashed his nerves which has made him limp from waist below. They need to perform an operation but they can't.

His ribs have cracked and the broken rib bones have punctured both his lungs. Because of this, blood has started accumulating in his lungs. This is a heart-wrenchingly gruesome scene. They use a mechanized motor to suck out blood from his lungs and it keeps filling up a large can below. Only when this bleeding stops can they perform the operation.

There's bright side to this. His hands and legs have not got fractured as we originally thought to be. He has bruises but no fractures. And even better news is that he has gained consciousness and started to speak slowly.

Funnily, the first thing he asked after he gained consciousness was to meet his class teacher and college principal so that he can ask for notes of the classes he has missed. Little did he know that it would take him a year to recover.

And even if he recovers, the doctors have said he may never be able to walk again. For the rest of his life.

That's tragic. Relatives and friends haven't told this to his mother yet. She would get even more hysterical.

I saw extreme acts of kindness. His college friends have gone around and collected nearly Rs. 1 lakh, all personal contributions from college mates. Sudhakar, a childhood friend, had contact his own circle of friends and arranged for eight units of O+ve blood which would be needed for the operation.

I also saw dark side of things. The ugly business world of hospitals. As soon as the accident happened, the students rushed Prabhu and his other injured friend to Govt General Hospital. They said that there is a waiting period of 10 days because of pending operations. 10 days?!! This boy didn't look like he would survive 10 hours.

One of the GH doctors gave reference to Apollo hospital and said it might cost 1 lakh rupees. His friends contacted Apollo and asked for an estimated costs. Based on oral description of the case, the hospital gave an estimate of Rs. 3 lakhs. This was steep money for the family but they didn't have a choice really. The rushed him over and admitted him. Three days later, the estimate was increased to Rs.7 lakhs. Yesterday, the estimate was again revised to Rs.8.5 lakhs. I have a strong suspicion it may not end here. For his parents, who run an STD booth to survive, this is a double blow. Now, they don't know which to worry more about. Their son (who may never walk again) or this huge financial shock.

I'm not blaming the hospital. I have very high regards for Apollo. The hospital has saved my cousin and uncle from the grasp of death. Their care and treatment is undoubtedly high class. Unfortunately, so is their cost.

I went up to Prabhu's cousin sister and told her about your offer to help financially. She broached the topic with Prabhu's parents. For them, this is an awkward situation. They have never really had to take in money from others before. The fact is they are extremely stretched financially. They will be grateful for any help they can get at this stage.

For those of you who have offered to help, please do help the parents out. Thanks to Nag's suggestion, I have created a donation page at ChipIn.com . Please note that while I'm helping set up the account, all funds go directly to Prema, the boy's cousin sister's account.



For those in India who might want to donate in Indian rupees, here is the Prabhu's Mother's bank account.

Name: A.Indira Gandhi
Account No: 500061191
Bank: Indian Bank
Branch: Tirupattur

Please note that this is purely voluntary. Do not feel obligated to help. Help only if you can. Any small help is appreciated.

Prabhu is at CCU Bed # 46 at Apollo Hospital. His mobile phone is currently with his parents or with the person who is taking the shift to stay at the hospital. The number is 94862 39694. The boy's father's name is Ravi Chandran and mother's name is Indra. His cousin sister Prema's mobile number is 98417 37722.

I have helped collect funds before, during the Tsunami but never for an individual. Personally, I'm not so much for collecting funds via my blog. But after seeing so much requests to help, I would be doing an injustice to both Prabhu and his parents if I did not help.

If you have helped raise funds before, please offer your advise and suggestions. Thank you.

P.S: I have set up a Wiki to update the progress on Prabhu's health. It's at http://HelpPrabhu.pbwiki.com There isn't much right now but will add info on it soon.

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February 11, 2007

Seen Life Crashing Down?

It's cruel how life can completely change. Here's the true life incident of my neighbour that took place on Saturday. Imagine this, there's this bright bubbly guy who just got into engineering college. His lower middle class parents have scraped the bottom of their life savings to fund his education. It looked like any other guy's story, the boy would pass out of college, get a job in a software company and support his parents and help close out all the loans. Unfortunately, life took a different path.

The boy and his friends were on their hostel terrace, three floors high. While playing around, one of his friends tripped over the side wall, and while trying to hold on to anything to keep him from falling, he unfortunatley grabbed his friend's shirt. So, both the boys crashed to the ground below. Luckily, both the guys survived but with terrible consquences. Half my neighbour's ribs are broken, heavy internal bleeding, hands and legs fractured and he's become limp waist down. I hear the other kid is serious too.

What really tugged my heart strings were his parent's reaction when the doctor said that the hospital expenses would amount to Rs.7 lakhs, twice what they had paid for his engineering. Without blinking an eyelid, they decided to sell of their modest house. For them, their only son is everything.

And, today is the boy's birthday. Life.... can be cruel.

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